What are the 7 best steps to date online like a Pro?
Dating is NOT EASY. Meeting new people is hard enough, and the social distancing regulations have only worsened things. This is where online dating comes into the picture.
Picking up women in bars seems to work on TV. But in the real world, that’s rarely the case. Like me, you won’t enjoy wasting time at bars and cafes trying to land a date. For busy folks like us, dating websites are life savers.
Over the last many years, I’ve experimented with various dating platforms- mainstream and otherwise. From my experience, some websites work better than others, a risk I like to take. If you are fresh on the market and just starting your journey into online dating, here is the 7-step formula that ALWAYS works for me.
1. Pick the right dating platform
Clarity is everything. What exactly are you looking for? A fun getaway with an attractive date? An exciting evening of exploring fantasies? There are hundreds of dating websites out there. Some are specialized in niches like married dating, mature dating, queer dating, passionate relationships, etc. So, spend some time selecting the right dating platform for you.
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2. Create an Attractive profile
The popular myth is that only the top 10% of the dating pool has fun. The truth is only those who put effort into creating an attractive profile meet the women they are looking for.
A photograph speaks a thousand words. Having a well-designed dating profile is CRUCIAL to your success. Ideally, have more than one profile picture taken in a social setting. Pictures with cuddly pets also work like magic. And for the love of God, throw out the bathroom selfies, sunglass selfies, and shirtless selfies- they DON’T WORK. A modestly playful description with a pinch of fun usually does the trick: “I may not be the man of your dreams, but you can always choose the pizza toppings.”
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3. Great first impression
Striking a conversation is the first step to any connection. To have a passionate relationship, you want them to like you. Online dating may not be as difficult as traditional dating, but you still need to make some effort. In the first few messages, show your genuine interest in the date instead of getting carried away by your wants.
Do your homework to improve your chances of finding the date of your dreams as fast as possible. Cheesy one-liners can be great icebreakers, but nothing beats a good personalized message. Women on online dating sites are bombarded with “hey beautiful” and “ur hot” daily. Don’t be lazy and sleazy. Create a decent first impression.
4. Get on the Same Page
Do you know how I save my time from idle chit-chat?
After initial introductions and clear indications of mutual interest, I filter out the uninterested matches. The best way to know if you are both up for the same experience is by simply ASKING. Not at the start of the conversation, of course. You don’t want to come off as desperate and needy. But having an honest conversation is the key to having a great date.
The most effective way to find what you want is a no-bullshit approach. Unlike mainstream dating sites, women tend to be non-judgemental on online dating sites. Is she up to Netflix and Chill? Is she interested in a fun rendezvous? Is she looking for a zero-commitment relationship? If it’s not what you want, politely conclude the chat. Always get on the same page before your offline meeting.
5. Take the Initiative
What do you do if you feel the electric sexual energy? It’s time to plan a meet-up! Save time by taking things offline as soon as possible. And ALWAYS take the initiative to arrange the meeting. Plan to meet in a public spot, and then you can take it from there. Be flexible and take her suggestions into account.
It is important for both parties to feel safe and comfortable before engaging in an intimate relationship. If she seems uninterested in a meeting, move on without holding grudges. Whether you end up meeting or not, be respectful and courteous. Be a gentleman, even if it’s just a casual meet-up.
6. Have a Good time
In preparation for the meeting, be well-groomed. Dirty nails and unkempt hair are a big NO for attractive women. I usually wear comfortable and occasion-appropriate clothing. Smelling good is crucial but don’t overdo it. Wear scents with woody, smokey, or spicy undertones to accentuate your manliness. And be punctual to the dot.
Offline meetings can be a hit or miss. Remember that consent is key to moving things forward regardless of what was planned. NEVER push your date into something she is not sure of. It is best to call things off if she seems hesitant. Be graceful in both giving and getting rejections. There is plenty of fish in the sea.
7. Be a Gentleman
You can be both- an alpha and a gentleman. Intimacy is unfulfilling without a strong dose of attraction. So, be the best version of yourself. Everything should go as planned if you strike the right note with your initial interactions. If it doesn’t, brush it off and keep moving.
I’ve met many first-timers who opt for online dating to avoid the awkwardness of offline interactions and be disappointed because some women on these platforms shy away when things get serious. If she ghosts you, respect her decision and find someone who matches your vibes. NEVER resort to overthinking or childish mind games that will leave you unhappy and exhausted. Follow these tried and tested tips, and the world is your oyster!